dnnyh refdz 795b8 dntk9 2979n byi9a tdr82 2k57r n4ne6 kih6z ftyds 8fafe b3htz 7f83b nd54h 2dy79 eds3h 92r96 yby6y f34er 5ttzi I was fighting cancer, my gf was fighting depression. She proposed a break up after 3 years of relationship, I am scared. |

I was fighting cancer, my gf was fighting depression. She proposed a break up after 3 years of relationship, I am scared.

2022.01.17 22:29 Mr_ACP I was fighting cancer, my gf was fighting depression. She proposed a break up after 3 years of relationship, I am scared.

I am 25 now and she is as well, we started the relationship in college at 22 both. So, this is a long story so I appreciate if you read it till the end. I started a relationship with my gf in 2018, we were so happy from the get go, we were very different people, she was social and upbeat and I was more of an introvert and kept to myself. She loved dancing and family reunions with a passion, and I could never go with her cause I have certain inhibitions I could not let go, thats when the cracks began. We talked about marriage after a year and had regular conversations about the future. However a year later her father died, literally in her arms, and I was trapped in another country and I could not be there for her. That was another crack. She started to be depressed around this time, and I failed to see how bad it was, she bursted crying every once in a while and I could just hold her and tell reassuring words, due to my social inhibitions I really did not know what to do, and I did not seeked professional help for myself in order to improve for her, that was my mistake. 6 months after dad I was sent away cause of work and could not be there for her during difficult times. After I came back the pandemic began and we became isolated, the relationship was going well and we loved each other so much. Every weekend she went to her father's hometown and she loved it there, and I never went with her...idk why, I really really wanted to, but could not do it, could not bring myself to break my chains.
6 months later, august 2020 I was diagnosed with stage lll stomach cancer, I asked her to leave me cause I thought I was going to die and did not want her to see me suffer, she refused and stayed with me the whole way, I made it and survived, however, while this was going on and I was fighting cancer she told me that she was feeling sadder and sadder, and tried to tell me stuff and I just brushed her off by saying things like "Hey at least you are not dying like me" and stuff of that sorts, which of course was a bad thing to say, but I cant really blame myself, I was fighting cancer and I felt pretty broken myself, however I do regret those things I said. After I survived I was obviously very very scared of COVID and of dying, she asked me to go to concerts with her and to weddings, I said no cause I was scared of catching COVID and dying, I survived and was out of danger but still felt traumatised.
One day she came home and said she was going to tell me something very important, and while she was talking i didnt know how to handle it and started to do something stupid, I started cleaning a desk, in the end she told me "never mind". I acted stupidly cause I knew what she was trying to tell me, she was going to tell me that she tried to kill herself, and I knew it, but I was so scared of hearing it cause I could not do anything about it, I love her to death and wanted to help her, but I was still traumatised and sometimes could not even help myself, so how could I help her?
About a month later she came and told me to break up, I was shocked, after all we had been thorugh she wanted that. We talked about marriage, about our future and now she was telling me that she did not see that future anymore, that we were too different, that I never danced with her or went to meet her family, that we are in the end incompatible, and that she went thorugh the hardest times of her life without me, by herlsef. She said that she did not felt attracted to me and that she lost all happiness, that she did not even hugged her mom, which she always did before. She told me that she wanted to fix herslef before being with me or anyone. I was heartbroken, cause I realised I failed her, she told me it was not my fault that "this is the way you are" she said, in the end she was not sure if breaking up was the right thing to do after so many years, love and overcoming adversity. So I managed to convince her to just take a break from the relationship until she felt happy again.
However these last weeks ive seeked professional help, started therapy and went through self discovery. And I realised that I made too many mistakes, that I should have danced with her and went to her father's hometown, that I should have been there more for her, I should have showed my love more, cause I love her to death, that cancer battle showed me that I would do anything for her. She told me we were incompatible, however I feel that I can work through these inhibitions, I can go dance with her and I can go with her to see her family now, I feel that that is what I always wanted, I just could not do it before cause I did not know I wanted it (if that makes sense), I made excuses like "i dont like that town" or "I dont like to dance" to myself, to justify why I did not do those things for her. Going to therapy I realised those were lies, I did not dance cause I was too embarrased of myself, I did not go to see her family cause I have family traumas myself, and those were hard to admit, so I made excuses.
I could not be there for her, I could not be the person I should have been for her, however I feel I can do those things now, that I can be that person now. She is the best thing that ever happened to me, more than surviving cancer. My deepest fear is that she doesnt believe me, that she believes I am stucked in my mistakes of the past, that she believes "thats truly who you are and you cant improve". She told me before "if we break up I dont believe in second chances" but then she said "but hey I never believed we could be a couple either". That last bit gives me hope, I am trying everything to improve, to be better for her and for myself, to do all the things I missed, cause I regret missing them from the bottom of my heart. I want to dance with her, I want to visit her family with her, go to weddings, I am ready to get over my trauma, my problems and be the person she needs, a person that she does not need to keep away from to feel happy, but a person that supports her.
I need to tell her this, that I want our break to be over, that I can be better, however I am scared to do it cause she may not take me back, or she will believe I am smothering her and not giving her space. But I also feel that the more I wait the more she will forget me, I am kind of stuck and unsure what to do, right now I just keep casual conversations with her but I am scared to ask her to come over, how do I get over this? What are your general thoughts on the situation? Any help is well appreciated.
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2022.01.17 22:29 TheMidnightAnime H: JEGhost Railway, JUG ReplenishAP APcost handmade, and JUG ReplenishAP RW Fixer W: Offers

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2022.01.17 22:29 TheTankKDempsey [H]$25 Best Buy gc [W] $25 Amazon gc

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2022.01.17 22:29 Embarrassed-Lab3661 Accurit

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2022.01.17 22:29 ReasonableAdvisor52 Do we only want attention?

Hi guys! So my friend and I were talking, I told her i was Pan. She then commented that “All people in the LGBTQIA community are only in that just so they can be different, and be in the spotlight, bc they have nothing else to offer to be in the spotlight.” Naturally i was offended. That ties into the whole “you don’t know what your talking about, you don’t know anything” bs people say all the time….but then it got me thinking. What if it’s all in my head? What if subconsciously I’m actually not pan, but really straight and only thinking I’m pan so I can get attention. How do I know I’m truly that and not a faker? Are there people in the LGBTQIA community that fake being part of it just for the attention? What do you guys think?
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2022.01.17 22:29 ShotBot How much longer do you think this podcast lasts?

I honestly don't see this podcast lasting much longer. Seems like everyone dislikes each other and don't have good chemistry.
But most importantly, I think the podcasters are sabotaging their own economic interests by voicing their opinions on all of these current events and cultural issues.
For example, when Chamath expressed his own personal opinion on China, and blue check Twitter and the news reports it as "Golden State Warriors team owner doesn't care about China's genocide of Uhygyrs".
We seen this also with David Sacks, when a segment of him talking about his Solana investments went viral because he said he was trying to sell his billion dollar position of Solana.
View Poll
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2022.01.17 22:29 letsberealalistc Cost of living.!!!!!

My gas bill is up. My hydro bill is up. Gasoline costs more. Food cost more. MY WAGE HAS HONE DOWN WITH INFLATION!! WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO. WORK TO DIE POOR?
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2022.01.17 22:29 BanksKnowsBest FIFA recognizes Canada captain Christine Sinclair for record goal-scoring

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2022.01.17 22:29 coolone007_26 Truth about weed.

Truth about weed. submitted by coolone007_26 to weed [link] [comments]

2022.01.17 22:29 EatingCrayolaCrayons Question about plagiarism

Is it plagiarism if it’s just listing 3 things a product is used for? I was about to submit my project but I had to run it through an originality test and it flagged this part where I listed the uses. I did also cite my source did that makes a difference.
Thank you in advance and if you need me to explain something I’ll do it in the comments.
submitted by EatingCrayolaCrayons to AskTeachers [link] [comments]

2022.01.17 22:29 ThroatierRiver Do you ever feel that no one ever checks up on you to ask how you are even though you tend to always do when you sense something is off with a friend(s)?

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2022.01.17 22:29 ThaiHandModel got a new hat

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2022.01.17 22:29 Interesting-Bake-144 Benchpress.

I have went from 130 to 135 in 4 Days. Pretty proud of myself I couldn’t even bench 120 a month ago. Am I doing good ?
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2022.01.17 22:29 itmeblorko Alternative to Roll20?

Hey hey looking for a better platform to use for virtual games than Roll20. It’s server connection or whatever is just constantly janky on us all the time and we’re all sort of at our wits end and I don’t want this game to end haha so if anyone has any recommendations please throw my way! Thank you thank you thank you
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2022.01.17 22:29 QuesoFresca Now Meghan complains about the BBC: Duchess of Sussex demands action after presenter Amol Rajan says she misled court in companion podcast for the controversial royal documentary The Princes And The Press

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2022.01.17 22:29 Dovahkiin314159 9 today including from yesterdays

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2022.01.17 22:29 berrysauce How did you deal with it when you realized your dream wasn't going to come true?

How did you cope with the grief that never went away, if it never did?
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2022.01.17 22:29 TopDragon816 I'm happy to finally be able to say good luck on Ganyu's rerun!

I'm happy to finally be able to say good luck on Ganyu's rerun! submitted by TopDragon816 to Ganyu [link] [comments]

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2022.01.17 22:29 The_Sovien_Rug-37 spaceEngine is high fidelity space sim that started in 2011 and is still in ongoing development. it was made by a single person, and yet is both less costly than sc and better preforming. if you want evidence as to what this could be, here it is. and there isn't even a ship package

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2022.01.17 22:29 bigfootadler How to navigate applying for multiple jobs?

I’m a recent graduate currently searching for a new job but applying for multiple jobs at once makes me incredibly anxious. I’m nervous that I’ll get an offer for one job before I hear back from another job that I would prefer and I don’t know how to navigate that. Do I ask them to wait until I hear back from the other or is that considered rude? Any advice is appreciated!
submitted by bigfootadler to jobs [link] [comments]

2022.01.17 22:29 mrezar Cultural differences

I just left germany. I spent 40 days in Hamburg and I dont feel like going back. All the stares, people refusing to talk to me, bumping on me or on my girlfriend on the subway... its all so stressful. At first I thought it was because I simply started speaking english right away and not even say a nice "hallo" (i just went for a "good morning"). Then I changed, I tried to learn basic words, even decorated the "sorry" (never heard anyone saying tho). It didnt change. On my check in at the airport I almost gave up coming back cause the lady was so rude at me I didnt want to talk to her anymore, I got so nervous I fell on the floor and they laughed at me??
I read a lot of posts towards racism or xenophobia on this sub and how we should no misunderstand it with "german cultural differences" and I was just wondering, is that an excuse? How many other countries are like that? Ive been to switzerland and I felt like a lord, but those are the only countries I know besides home (brazil).
I dont mean to sound offensive or disrespectful with this post and I know I cant generalize, i just wanted to say something
submitted by mrezar to germany [link] [comments]

2022.01.17 22:29 Chubby_dude22 22 [M4M] indiana white daddy looking for nonwhite femboy IRL LTR

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2022.01.17 22:29 emrittoart Lavender Field, [1920 x 1080]

Lavender Field, [1920 x 1080] submitted by emrittoart to wallpaper [link] [comments]

2022.01.17 22:29 Horatio_the_Punk Contender for longest ingrown hair

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